Jeremy Clarkson Despre Violenta/jeremy Clarkson on violence

7/28/2019 Jeremy Clarkson Despre Violenta/jeremy Clarkson on violence

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S-ar putea s fi auzit de un fotbalist pe nume Joey Barton. n afara gazonului ceea ce s-arnumi un btui, de curnd, a stat un pic la pucrie pentru agresiuni i perturbareaordinii publice. Din cnd n cnd, a fost acuzat i de vtmare corporal. Iar altdat, adat cu maina peste un brbat n Liverpool la ora dou dimineaa.

i-ai putea imagina c, pe gazon, lucrurile ar sta un pic altfel. Dar, nu. A fost prins lovindun adversar cu pumnul n piept i, n chiar ultimul meci al sezonului din Premiership caretocmai s-a ncheiat, s-a uitat repede la gtul expus al unui juctor advers i i-a zis credc lumea ar fi un loc mai bun dac i-a trage n cot acolo. Ceea ce a i fcut.

A primit un cartona rou din partea arbitrului, la care a reacionat lovind cu piciorul unalt juctori ncercnd s-i trag un cap n gur altuia. Ca urmare, a fost catalogat dectre cei mai muli fani ai fotbalului drept un golan periculos. ns eu n-a fi att deconvins.

Ca regul general, nu voi lovi pe nimeni, cu excepia lui Piers Morgan. Am trecut prin

toat coala fr s fiu implicat n vreo btaie i, chiari atunci cnd nite biei dinDoncaster mi-au pus caca de cine n apc pentru c purtam un fular cu Chelsea, amrmas calm i politicos. Chiar dac aveam ochii nlcrimai.

Totui, dei nu obinuiesc s-i lovesc pe James i Richard cu pumnul n piept, pot sneleg de ce oameni precum Joey Barton simt nevoia s-i loveasc colegii i adversarii.

Parlamentarul laburist Eric Joyce a explicat asta destul de bine acum foarte puin timpcnd, dup ce a but una mic n barul Camerei Comunelor, a vzut civa conservatorii i-a pocnit. Se justific spunnd c aa e el. Unii i rezolv disputele cu pixul, aliiprin justiie. El i folosete pumnii i crede c dac doi tipi vor s rezolve o ceart n

spatele barului, e dreptul lor s fac asta. Are dreptate. Este dreptul lor.

Mai mult dect att, e foarte important s avem tot felul de oameni n Parlament, astfel catoate pturile societii s fie reprezentate: vagabonzi, escroci, mincinoi, preoi... ibtui. Pentru c nu poi s reprezini oamenii dect dac eti reprezentativ.

A merge chiar mai departe. Vedem de multe ori la televizor parlamentarii unorriredui la o mas diform de transpiraie i pumni i cred c, din cnd n cnd, mi-arplcea s-i vd i pe ai notri n aceeai situaie. Aa c i dau un sfat domnuluiCameron: data viitoare cnd domnul Miliband e enervant, s sar peste mas i s-i tragun pi n ou.

Mi-ar plcea s vd genul sta de activitate i la Wimbledon. Ai asudat ntreaga via.Te-ai antrenat i iar te-ai antrenat, nu ai but, nu ai fumat i te-ai abinut de la toatecelelalte lucruri frumoase pe care viaa le ofer pentru a putea fi cel mai bun dintre ceimai buni. E minge de meci. Serviciul adversarului iese n afar. ns arbitrul de linie, unprofesor de geografie n vrst cu o plrie caraghioas, spune c e bun. ntreaga ta viaa fost irosit. Aa c cine te-ar putea nvinui dac, sub impulsul momentului, ai fugi sprearbitru i l-ai lovi cu racheta?


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i-l mai aduci aminte pe Nelson Piquet crnd pumni i picioare n Eliseo Salazar? iiminte cum Michael Schumacher a luat-o la galop pe linia boxelor pentru a discuta cevacu David Coulthard? Putem s le nelegem reaciile. i, mai mult dect att, ne plac. Audat natere unor momente pe care le savurm i la care inem.

Peste ocean n America, oamenii merg s vad un meci de hochei nu pentru a admiraviteza i precizia, ci pentru bti. Iar aici, fanii rugby-ului se nfierbnt foarte tare atuncicnd cei doi juctori cu numrul opt ncep s se bat ca nite chiori. Mai ales dac li sealtur i restul echipelor.

Problema este c, n zilele noastre, suntem programai s rmnem calmi. S ntoarcemi cellalt obraz. Ceea ce mie mi convine de minune. Nu mi-ar plcea s primesc unpumn. Dar n sport i n politic, acolo unde nervii sunt aa cum e i normal ntinila maximum, e inuman s le ceri s respire adnc i s-i vad de treab mai departe.Probabil tocmai din cauza asta tot mai muli sportivi de top i politicieni sunt att de

anoti i de robotici.

Toate astea aduc discuia ctre o poz pe care am vzut-o zilele trecute n ziar. n eaaprea un domn de vrst medie care ncerca s mearg pe biciclet pe un drum ngust dear, n timp ce o doamn tnr i trgea un picior. Se pare c ar fi mers prea ncet pemijlocul drumului, iar doamna s-a decis s-i trag o lecie.

Toi au czut de acord c femeia e un pericol public i c ar trebui nchis pentru totrestul vieii. Pentru c, dei e n regul s te descarci ntr-un moment de tensiune peterenul de sport, nu e deloc n regul s te compori aa pe drum.

Totui, nainte s-o trimitem pe femeie la pucrie, s ne ntrebm ceva: cum ar fi dac eaar fi aflat c mama i-a fost dus la spital i nu mai are mult de trit? i cum ar fi dac, ntimp ce fumega n spatele ciclistului care se deplasa prea lent, ar fi aflat c drgua eimam a i murit? Ar fi atunci acceptabil s-i trag un ut celui care nu i-a permis s-i iaadio de la propria mam?

Mi se ntmpl foarte des s merg pe A44 n spatele cuiva care se deplaseaz foarte ncet,cu o vitez pe care el o consider sigur. De cele mai multe ori, e vorba despre btrni.Reaciile lor sunt lente i nu se simt n largul lor la viteze de peste 40 km/h. n plus, nu segrbesc nicieri i sunt de prere c lumea ntreag ar fi un loc mai bun dac nimeni nu s-ar mai grbi nicieri. Astfel c nu simt nici cea mai mic urm de vin fa de coloana de

maini din spatele lor. De fapt, e posibil s cread c le fac oferilor o favoare.

De cele mai multe ori, tac i nghit. Dac pot depi, o fac, iar dac nu, pun o melodiefrumoas i m relaxez. Dar dac a fi un genist i n cteva minute ar exploda o bombnuclear pus de teroriti? Dac nevast-mea ar intra n travaliu?

Dac un copil are nevoie de tatl lui? Atunci momentul capt ncrctur, furia crete idevine acceptabil s ndei cuplul n vrst i Peugeot-ul lor ntr-un gard viu.


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Ciclitii i pierd cumptul foarte des i nu pot s-i nvinovesc. Pentru c atunci cndun ofer de autobuz, mnat de prostie sau de arogan, vireaz la stnga (dreapta, ncazul Romniei n.r.) fr s semnalizeze sau s se asigure, iar tu aproape c eti strivitde roile lui din spate, devii un sac de piele plin cu dopamin, serotonin i adrenalin.

Eti la fel de aprins ca un iepure sperios. i, n momentul la, nu poi fi tras larspundere dac te urci n autobuz, i desfaci liul i te uurezi pe ofer.

Iat-ne, deci. Violena. O ursc. M sperie. Mi-a dori ca pumnul omului s fie fcut dinvat. Dar cteodat? Hmmm...

You may be familiar with a footballist called Joey Barton. Off the pitch, he's a fighty sortof soul, and, in recent years, he's done a bit of time for common assault. He has also beenconvicted of assault occasioning actual bodily harm. And once he ran over a man at 2amin Liverpool.

You might imagine that, on the pitch, things would be different. But no. He has beendone for punching an opponent in the chest, and then, in the very last match of this year'sthrilling Premiership, he took a quick look at the exposed throat of an opponent andplainly thought, "I think things would be better if I elbowed him in that". So he did.

He was given a red card by the referee, and he reacted to this by kicking anotheropponent and trying to headbutt yet another. As a result, he has been labelled as a nastypiece of work by most footy fans. But I'm not so sure.

As a general rule, I will not hit anyone, unless they are Piers Morgan. I went through allof my school years without getting into a fight, and even when some Doncaster townboys put dog crap in my school cap because I was wearing a Chelsea scarf, I remainedcalm and polite. If a bit tearful.

However, while I am not given to punching James and Richard in the chest, I dounderstand why the likes of Mr Barton feel the need to go around hitting their colleagues

and rivals.It was explained rather well by the Labour MP Eric Joyce, who, earlier this year, had adrink in the House of Commons bar, saw a couple of Tories and hit them.

He says he's that sort of man. Some people settle their disputes with a pen, some with arecourse to law. He uses his fists and reckons that if two chaps want to settle an argumentround the back of a pub, that's up to them. He's right. It is.


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What's more, it's vital that we have all sorts of different people in Parliament, so that allwalks of society are represented: toffs, vagabonds, cheats, liars, vicars and pub brawlers.Because how can you represent the people when you aren't representative?

In fact, I'd go further. We sometimes see foreign parliaments reduced to a heaving massof punches and sweat, and I think that, from time to time, I'd like to see the same sort ofthing in ours. So I say this to Mr Cameron: the next time Mr Miliband is being annoying,leap over the table and kick him firmly in the groin.

I'd like to see this sort of activity at Wimbledon too. You have sweated your whole life.You have trained and trained, not drunk, not smoked, and sacrificed all of the treats thatlife can offer to be the best of the best of the best. It's match point. The serve is out. Butthe linesman, an elderly geography teacher in a silly hat calls it in.

Your whole life has been wasted. So who could blame you, in the heat of the moment, for

running up to the official and hitting him with your racquet?Remember Nelson Piquet kicking and punching the useless Eliseo Salazar? RememberMichael Schumacher charging down the pit lane to discuss' things with DavidCoulthard? We quite understand why. And more than this: we like it.

They're moments we savour and cherish. Over in America, people go to see a game of icehockey not to witness speed and precision but for the fights. And here, the rugby crowd isalways cheered immensely when two number eights start beating the living crap out ofone another. Especially when the rest of the team joins in.

The trouble is that today we are programmed to stay calm. To turn the other cheek. Andthat's fine if you're me. I would hate to be punched. But in sport and politics whereemotions are - and indeed should be - as charged as an equatorial summer storm, it'sinhuman to take a deep breath and carry on. Perhaps that's why so many top sports starsand politicians these days are so robotic and dreary.

All of this brings me neatly to a picture we saw in the newspapers recently. It was of amiddle-aged gentleman trying to cycle along a country lane while being kicked by ayoung woman. Apparently, he had been going too slowly in the middle of the road, andthe woman had decided to teach him a lesson.

Everyone shared the opinion that the woman was a menace and should be locked up forthe rest of measurable time. Because, while it may be all right to lash out in the heat ofthe moment on a sports pitch, it is extremely not all right to behave like that on the road.

However, before we lock away the woman, let's ask a question: what if she had receivedword that her mother had been taken to hospital and didn't have long to live? And, whatif, while stuck behind the cyclist, fuming at his slow progress, word came through that


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her dear old Mum had died? Would it then be acceptable to kick the man who'd preventedher from having a last goodbye?

Very often, I am held up by someone who is driving along the A44 at a speed that theyconsider to be safe. They are often elderly. Their reactions are slow, and they do not feel

confident going above 25mph. Plus, they are in no particular rush and feel the worldwould be a far better place if others were in no particular rush either. So they have nosense of guilt about the tail of overheating metal in their wake. Secretly, they may evenfeel empowered.

Mostly, I put up with it. If I can overtake, I will, and if I cannot, I will put on a nice tuneand relax. But what if I were in bomb disposal and I had just moments to get to a terroristnuke? What if my wife were in labour? What if a child needed its Dad? Then the momentis charged, and the rage will build, and it's only human to barge the elderly couple andtheir infuriating Peugeotinto a hedge.

Cyclists lose their temper all the time, and I don't blame them, mostly. Because when abus driver, fuelled by stupidity or arrogance, turns left without warning and you arenearly killed by his rear wheels, you become a skin bag full of dopamine, and serotoninand adrenalin. You are as psyched up as a frightened rabbit. And, in that instant, you can'treally be held to account if you board the bus, unzip your flies and relieve yourself allover the driver.

So, there we are. Violence. I loathe it. I'm frightened of it. I wish the human knuckle wasmade from kapok. But sometimes? Hmmm.
http://www.topgear.com/uk/tags/Peugeothttp://www.topgear.com/uk/tags/Peugeothttp://www.topgear.com/uk/tags/Peugeot

Jeremy Clarkson Despre Violenta/jeremy Clarkson on violence

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